Bittersweet

Yesterday was a bittersweet kind of day. It was my last "official" day that I worked at the hospital. Today, I am on call for emergencies only. Hopefully I will not get called in.

I have been at this particular hospital for 12 years (working on call for 16 years). I have met so many new friends, kind people, friendly helpers, smiling faces, and genuinely great people. The floor I worked on, the people treated us just like an extension of them, even though we were contracted employees and not actual hospital employees. We were like family. I will definitely miss them. They gave us a sweet farewell party with more food than anyone could imagine. I think it could have fed all the employees for the entire hosptial. What a unfortgettable, kind and thoughtful gesture. Yes, I left with tears in my eyes.

What I won't miss, and am looking forward to is, NOT getting called in during; the middle of the night, one of my kids sporting events, a family outing, holidays, just a lazy day at home, a blizzard and having the national guard come pick me up to make sure I get in to work, a neighbor driving me in his 4 wheel vehicle, a funeral of a friends family member, ladies events at church, the middle of a church service, a birthday party, superbowl, when my kids are sick and needing mommy but having to have daddy......So many times over the last 16 years, I have been called in to someone in need, and had to leave whatever I was doing, and rush to the hospital. So much family life has been missed, yet so many lives I have saved by doing what I do. They would not have lived, had I not gone in.

A worthy job, yet a costly job.

A new season will be beginning for me. A new job. I won't necessarily be saving lives in the emergency of the moment. I will be educating new patients on new life choices they will need to make. Teaching patients to be able to care for themselves at home instead of a clinic. I will be giving them a sense of freedom in the midst of a new lifestyle due to their disease. Much like I will be starting a new lifestyle with my new job, a new freedom.

Taking a deep breathe, & praying like crazy, cause here I go.....