Ha!

Want to make God laugh??

Tell Him your plans.

I have been making God laugh an awful lot lately!

Simplicity

Here's a little funny. When you just need to laugh at yourself.

We were at the table getting ready to eat dinner. We all had food on our plates, grace had been said and most of us had started eating, except babygirl.

She looks at me and says "Mommy, I am hungry."

My mind is reeling, and thinking; What????You are at the table and food is on your plate??? Don't you like your food?? Are you going to tell me you don't LIKE what we are having? Are you going to tell me you don't WANT what we are having? Maybe she just feels hungry, but is really going to throw up all over.

She is looking at me with a puzzeled look, wondering what Mommy is thinking about and why it is taking so long to answer her. She is definitely waiting for me to answer her.

After analyzing the situation very closely, I come to the most profoundest statement I could in the moment.....

"Ok, honey, then just eat."

She replies "Ok"

LOL.

Really???? Are you kidding me??? Was she really waiting for me to say she could eat???
And to think I analyzed every possible scenario that I could think of in 10 seconds, to be the best most profound Mom there is. And all I needed to tell her was to dig in????

Well, I just had to laugh at myself. Do I really need to look for something so much more when the answer is so simple and staring at me in the face. Whew! Talk about making a mountain out of a mole hill. LOL.

Family- Thanksgiving Day '09

My side of the family on Thanksgiving Day '09
Mom and Dad in the middle.
The "Girls" (My sisters and I) with our families, from oldest to youngest.
14 grandkids in all

A different kind of busy

It's almost Turkey day. Today feels quite strange. It's a day that I would normally be working. We try to get all the patients done the day before a holiday. That way whoever is on call, only has to worry about emergencies and not routine patients. Typically, this makes for a very long day with a lot of patients who need treatments.

Instead, I am home making banana breads, monkey breads, oatmeal raspberry oatmeal bars, pumpkin bread, and stuffing. If I have time I may make some pretzel turtles. My dad loves those. Plus, I have to shop for a couple of birthday gifts for my nieces and nephews who will be here from out of state.

So it is a different kind of busy for me today. It definitely feels strange. My thoughts often go to the hospital and wonder if they are getting slammed or having a good day. I know they are severely understaffed. I guess long time habits are hard to break overnight.

But I am grateful not to be on call and to be home with my family, that is for sure!!

Bittersweet

Yesterday was a bittersweet kind of day. It was my last "official" day that I worked at the hospital. Today, I am on call for emergencies only. Hopefully I will not get called in.

I have been at this particular hospital for 12 years (working on call for 16 years). I have met so many new friends, kind people, friendly helpers, smiling faces, and genuinely great people. The floor I worked on, the people treated us just like an extension of them, even though we were contracted employees and not actual hospital employees. We were like family. I will definitely miss them. They gave us a sweet farewell party with more food than anyone could imagine. I think it could have fed all the employees for the entire hosptial. What a unfortgettable, kind and thoughtful gesture. Yes, I left with tears in my eyes.

What I won't miss, and am looking forward to is, NOT getting called in during; the middle of the night, one of my kids sporting events, a family outing, holidays, just a lazy day at home, a blizzard and having the national guard come pick me up to make sure I get in to work, a neighbor driving me in his 4 wheel vehicle, a funeral of a friends family member, ladies events at church, the middle of a church service, a birthday party, superbowl, when my kids are sick and needing mommy but having to have daddy......So many times over the last 16 years, I have been called in to someone in need, and had to leave whatever I was doing, and rush to the hospital. So much family life has been missed, yet so many lives I have saved by doing what I do. They would not have lived, had I not gone in.

A worthy job, yet a costly job.

A new season will be beginning for me. A new job. I won't necessarily be saving lives in the emergency of the moment. I will be educating new patients on new life choices they will need to make. Teaching patients to be able to care for themselves at home instead of a clinic. I will be giving them a sense of freedom in the midst of a new lifestyle due to their disease. Much like I will be starting a new lifestyle with my new job, a new freedom.

Taking a deep breathe, & praying like crazy, cause here I go.....

A time to Remember

Last friday I had the chance to go away overnight with a bunch of girlfriends. It was a time for our small group girls to get away and bond with one another, to get to know each other deeper. To be away from our responsibilties so we could laugh, cry, sit in silence, and of course eat.

Whenever there is a good time of fellowship.... food is involved. Funny, but for the most part true. Even Jesus fellowshipped around food, take the last supper for example. Food was definitely there.

It was definitely a time to relax, and a time to remember.

When I came home, babygirl came running to me with her high pitched shrill "Mommmmmmmy's home". Wow. That little girl can get to an octave high enough to break windows. It is just amazing.

After rehashing her night and day she asks me..
"Mommy lets pretend we are getting you ready for a Ball."

I ask.."Am I a princess and you are my fairy godmother?"
Her reply "Yes, Yes Yes!!!!!"

I ask her "Do you want me to go get the make up that goes on my eyes? And the blush that goes on my cheeks?"

Her eyes lit up the room and became as big as saucers. She says "For real? Oh, yes, yes, yes."
As she is jumping up and down.

So for the next hour and a half she begins to transform my plain, no make up face to her masterpiece. Wow! She kept saying "Oh mommy, you are so gorgeous. You are beautiful." She was cooing all these little "oh's, and ah's" and any other little noise antic that communicated her delight in what she was creating on my face.

Periodically she would hold up a mirror so I could view her masterpiece in progress. Wow!

I can honestly say I was speechless.

If you did not know that a five year old did my make up, you would of thought I had been beaten and battered. I was quite the sight. Widget did not know babygirl was doing my make up and he was concerned and said " Mom, what happened?"

After the make up babygirl progessed on to my hair. She had a certain style in her mind that she wanted to do. She just couldn't quite make it happen. So I ended up in a ponytail with a ribbon around it. That's when she changed her mind and said

"Mom, let's pretend we are going to cheerleading practice instead, and you make my hair just like yours.....and can I have make up too?"

Awwww. She always wants to be twins. So I am delighted to oblige to this request since we weren't going anywhere. I did her hair like mine, but I didn't give her the black eye beaten look. I made her beautiful and she felt like the cheerleader that she wanted to be.

Such simple things, but important times to connect with my daughter. Building that relationship. Building those memories. I hope one day she will have a daughter and do these same things and to be able to say. "I did this with my mom, and I loved it."

Trick or Treating....Not

In my last post, I mentioned how my 2 youngest kids had the H1N1 flu. The kids were recovering, they were fever free, but not out of the contagious period (fever free for 24 hours). So we needed to cancel trick or treating for them.
Oh did the tears come......
But they really did understand......
And so they accepted it, although they didn't like it.......

I had mentioned how I had 2 sad little kids who would not be able to trick or treat.
A few hours later we hear a knock at our door. A dear friend from church had trick or treated to my kids. Since they couldn't go out, she came to them. She had brought them each a pumpkin bucket filled to the top with candy, and activity books, and toys.
Their eyes lit up, their mouths turned into huge smiles with the surprise. As my friend left and I closed the door, the kids tore up the stairs squealing to show their daddy what they just received. What a blessing to see my kids blessed by my friend. To see them smiling and giddy after being so sick brought tears to my eyes. Thank you Debbie.
The story goes on. Our neighbor across the street, always calls us the night before to make sure we are stopping by to trick or treat. We told her they were not trick or treating due to their sickness. She gave them each another huge bag of candy. So very kind of you Julie. Grandma gave them each a bag of candy too. The giving didn't stop Halloween either. Their Aunt stopped by a bag full of trick and treat candy today for them as well. Thank you Robin. These 2 little kids who did not trick or treat, got more candy than the older 2 who did. How blessed we are to have such loving friends and family. God is good. All the time.

Most of that all happened Halloween afternoon. Later that evening, I needed to take the older 2 kids to a halloween party where they would do their trick or treating. As I left, my creative little boy was stilled bothered that his sister did not get to trick or treat. He was ok that he didn't, he had the candy. But he thought babygirl should not be neglected to dress up and enjoy that time. When I returned, I found the most precious sight.

Little man had taken the candy that they had received and put it at different places in the house. They had dressed up in costumes and were taking their new pumpkin buckets and trick or treating to these designated spots. HOW CUTE IS THAT!!!!!! He created their own little make believe neighborhood. They stopped at daddy's office, brothers bedroom, their own bedrooms, bathrooms, closets, etc. Anyplace that had a door that they could knock on and say trick or treat and then take some candy. I don't think babygirl can appreciate what a special boy her brother is, and how much he adores her. I pray she will know one day.

Difficult weeks

It's been a difficult time around here this past few weeks.

Hubby's grandmom fell and broke her hip, which led to a hip replacement, which led to her getting pneumonia, which led to being put on a ventilator. Then to be taken off the ventilator have a great day and decline later that night. The decision was made not to put her back on the breathing machine as those were her wishes. So a morophine drip was started to make her comfortable and no longer in pain, and eventually she breathed her last breath on earth. She passed away last wednesday and the funeral was today. That all took place over about 2 weeks.

Heaven received a great prayer warrior. We will be sad to not have her here, but happy for her to finally be home in heaven with her Lord.

We also had 2 sick little kids. My youngest 2 contracted the H1N1 flu. They were quite sick and the doctor was worried about babygirl. She didn't want to cough because it hurt too much. If she didn't cough, she could end up with pneumonia. The pneumonia is what alot of the kids are dying from, not the flu itself. Thankfully, both kids were given Tamiflu, and were able to recover much quicker. They were still sick for 5 days, though. That's a LONG time.

It has made me a germaphobe. I should have bought stock in clorox. LOL. I have done more disinfecting, bleaching, lysoling, washing sheets, and pillows, and clothes, and anything that might have been contaminated. Not to mention being a pest about everyone washing their hands, coughing into a tissue, quarentining (is that a word?) the older 2 kids, and using hand sanitzer.

Needless to say, that is why the blog has been quiet. Hopefully, life will get back to some sort of normal routine.

To give or not to give

The H1N1 vaccine.......

The question being...... to give or not to give??????

So much controversy around this subject, even within families not everyone agrees.

Hubby theory is...." side effects are better than death"

Hospital says...."you are an RN with direct patient care, therefore it is mandatory for you to get."

School says....."make an informed decision."

It's hard to make an informed decision with so much controversy and because it is new no one has seen what happens long term. But it is just a flu shot essentially, and we have had flu shots around for a long time.

Hmmmm.......

A chance to breathe

This year our schedule is so complicated by having to run kids here and their. Mostly just getting the to and from school. Whew! It has kind of taken me by surprise. I thought having all the kids in school would make things easier. With having babygirl half day, it feels like I am running all the time. I would love to think that I was handling it all by myself, and being that superwoman I strive to be. That just isn"t the case. I rely a ton on my husband to help with practices, pick-ups, dinners, you name it. He is such a HUGE help, with such a willing heart.

So when he tells me he has to go away on business for 5 days, my heart just sank.
How am I going to do all this running around by myself? I express my concern to hubby to which he says... "Come with me. We were going to go away in September, but that fell through so come with me now". After not much contemplating, I decided I WAS GOING!!!!

We were off to Oregon, the complete opposite side of the country. All the kids were situated with everyone having the master list to who goes where, when, and why, and who would be taking them. It was quite the logistic challenge to get 4 kids placed where it wouldn't be too much trouble for any one family. I think I did it.

All the way to Oregon, hubby kept saying you don't seem excited about going. In my defense, I just had a hard time letting go, and realizing we were actually going away without the kids for an extended amount of time. Hubby's meetings were during the week. We decided to go out a few days early to have some quality time, sight seeing, etc. before his meetings. We were celebrating 16 years of marriage. Wow!!

It was a great time to relax, catch my breath, and get refocused about the rest of the year. I think I may need another get away to make it through this year though. WHEW!!!

Melting my heart

Have you ever had one of those mornings that start out with.....

A sweet kiss from an 8 year old little boy, dressed to the nines, and him saying " Mommy. It's time to wake up."

Bleary eyed, and groggy I am thinking "Who is saying something and what are they saying and why are they talking to me in the middle of the night?"

Again, youngest son says "Mommy, we are going to be late for church." while he is hugging me this time.

WHAT????!!!!!! CHURCH????!!!! What time is it and more importantly, what day is it? Is it sunday?

I progress to look at the clock, and indeed, if we all didn't get up NOW, we would be late for church.

As I start waking up and getting around, I come to realize....My precious son has gone around to everyone's room to wake them up. He of course is already dressed and ready to go. Not so for the rest of us. We are rushing around getting showers and doing hair etc.

A short time later, my dear little boy proceeds up the stairs with 8 bagels that he has cooked and buttered for everyone. He said "I wanted to make sure everyone had something to eat. I figured they might not have enough time to get something, so, I brought it to you!"

What a servants heart. Not a word was mentioned about not getting breakfast, but little man saw what was sure to happen. Leaving for church without breakfast. He didn't want anyone to go hungry.

Talk about melting a mothers heart!! How grateful I am for him and who God is molding him to be.

Babygirl and Daddy's date

Friday I had to work an extra day, and had noone to be able to pick up babygirl from half day kindergarten. Daddy decided to take the day off from work and the 2 of them could have a date in the afternoon. It has been a long time since they had a date.

Daddy picks her up at school in jeans and a t-shirt, he's comfy it is his day off.

Daddy asks babygirl "Do you want to change out of your uniform or do you want to just go right now?"
She looks at him and says "Let's go home and change. I want you to dress up. (It has already started, she wants her man to look gooooood). I want you to wear that tie I gave you for christmas."

LOL. Daddy was not prepared for this and was completely shocked. But it was a date right? He should look good. So he complies and dressed up in a shirt, tie (the one she gave him), sports coat, dress pants and shoes and.....cologne (he had to smell good too. LOL).

After he is all changed he goes to babygirl's room to help her change. He picks out a pretty dress.
To which she replies "No thank you Daddy. That dress is itchy, I will just wear play clothes."

ROTFLMBO (rolling on the floor laughing my butt off)!!!!!!!!!!

Again, Daddy was not expecting that.

Off they go to their special spot to get chocolate milkshakes and french fries, with Daddy dressed to the nines and babygirl in play clothes.

Priceless!

A funny for friday

Today my daughter made me laugh.

She said something that wasn't particularly funny, but it was her delivery that sent me over the edge.

A simple observation of hers, she really wasn't trying to be funny, but I laughed.

We were on our way home from school, taking some of the back roads when she spotted it.

She saw a bright purple colored pick up truck and she says

"Wow..... a purple truck...... Now THAT is something you don't expect to see."

Are you ready for some FOOTBALL????

YAY!!! It's football season.

I am so excited football has started again. Unfortunately, it is the steelers who are playing, so I will be rooting for the Titans.

Go Ravens!!!! and anybody who plays against the steelers!!

Lovin my football season! Let the games begin!

First day of school- take 2

Oops, I didn't post this yesterday. Well here it is.

Tomorrow is yet another first day of school for us. It's the older 2 kids turn.

My oldest is starting his new adventures in high school. Wow! A freshman. I just can't believe it. I remember when I was a freshman and is seems only like yesterday, not 20 years ago.

I remember the fun times hanging out with friends, and the gigglefests we used to have. Trying to get certain guys to notice you and dating. Going to dances and proms, and of course skipping school to go off to the beach. Talking on the phone for hours. So many, many memories.

And to think, my son is now going to start making those memories too. It is a little scary for me to think about, but it is exciting too. There is no time like it, when you have freedom (that you earned from being trustworthy) and independence, yet the security of not being on you own yet. Having mom and dad there to keep the boundaries, limits and to be able to reel in when needed.

I praise God, that so far, we have a loving, respectful, and caring son who really does like to be with his family as much as he does his friends. Most importantly he has a heart for God.

And so far we don't embarress him. I hope we never do.

Survived

We SURVIVED!!!!!

Yes, we survived the first week of school with my 2 youngest children. Yahoo!!!!
The kids LOVE their new school. They come home excited and with so much to tell me about.
A far cry from what it was last year. Whew!!!!

My little man has refriended (if that is even a word....it is descriptive though) a boy in his class. It was a little boy who was on his first T-Ball team when he was just a little 4 year old boy. Double that age and they meet again at 8 years old. Everyday when I pick him up and when I drop him off at school in the morning it is a constant barage of.....

"Can my friend come over for a playdate?" or "Can I go over my friends house for a playdate?" or "Can so and so spend the night?" or "Can I spend the night at so and so's house?"

All with the same ending.....TODAY.

He is so enjoying this little boy that they don't want to spend a minute apart. YIKES!!!! I prayed for little man to find a good friend. WOW!! Did God answer FAST!!!!

We do know this little boy's family and they are sweet. At least I don't need to find out if I approve of this family before he can have his playdate. WHEW!! Thank you Lord. I don't think litttle man or his friend would make it, nor would I, without exploding! So, we will plan a playdate. Not today as they would like, but definitely someday very soon.

Little girl, STILL....ugh, has difficulty dropping off. She just won't let me go. It's just the actual event of separating. She does awesome the rest of the time, her teacher says so, and so does babygirl. Once I actually get her to let go of me and take her teachers hand, I go out her door, and I go to the window to her classroom (it is along the sidewalk so I am not being a stalker). I wave to her. She waves back or nods her head that she sees me. Now, if she would only do that after I walk her to her desk.

Any suggestions from anyone on how to get her to stop it?

Last year, I even tried rewarding her (ok, maybe it was more like bribing, but, ugh.... I was desperate) and it didn't work. I am grateful though, that she really does love her new school and her teachers. Praise God for that!!!!

Next, it will be to send off my older 2 sons. They start the day after labor day. Whew! That will be another post, a freshman and a six grade middle schooler...... 2 new worlds for them as well!

A funny thing

A funny thing happened to me. I was checking my email and came across and interesting one. Figuring it was spam, I almost didn't read it.

I opened this email, and that's when the laughing started. Apparently, someone has been following my blog and enjoyed reading it, so......here it comes......the funny part.......

she invited me to be a featured blogger on a popular site.

I find this really humorus as I don't say much in particular on my blog. It's not political, it's not comical, I don't offer tips and pointers. It's not a self help (except that it is a help for me to blurt out to the world what is going on in my life-I'm not sure that helps anyone). It's not even grammatically correct.

That's why I am laughing. If I were to say ok, I really have nothing to say.

So I will politely decline, out of self preservation.

Such a funny lady to offer such a funny thing. Albeit sweet and a compliment, it really is just funny.

First day at a new school

Tomorrow is going to be the first day at a new school for my 2 youngest kids. They are switching schools.
My youngest son is going into second grade, and is soooo excited. He had all his clothes layed out before dinner. His back pack is ready to go. I just need to make his lunch in the morning. As I put him to bed tonight, he said "I am so excited to be going to a school that is just perfect for me. I don't think I will be able to sleep tonight." Such a change from not wanting to go to school last year. It was a tough year for him. My prayer is that he finds some solid christian friends. As solid as a second grader can be.

Babygirl is not so excited. She has never wanted to change schools and wants to stay in her preschool classroom for the rest of her school days. A funny picture to imagine a highschooler in a preschool room, LOL. She usually has a very difficult time with the separation part. Cries, and clings, you have to pull her off of me. It's heart breaking for me. Last school year she would come home and tell me she cried a couple of times throughout the day. "Why?" I asked. She would say "cause I missed you" or "I didn't want my carrots" or "I had to go to the bathroom". Always some reason or another that she would have tears during the day. I pray she has matured this summer, enough to be able to get through the day without tears. Hopefully she will notice the other kids NOT crying and then won't do so herself.
I also think her teacher didn't mind her tears and would treat her special because of the tears. Maybe babygirl is smarter than we give her credit for and was using tears as a way to get attention from her teacher. Hmmm....
That won't work this year. Even though her teacher is as sweet as they come, she will need to be a big girl. My prayer for her is that she can drop off and go through the day without tears. And that she makes some nice friends.
Here's to the start of something new!

Soccer tourny

Today was a busy day, but a fun one. It started with an all day soccer tourny for Oldest son. He is in high school now (ugh...can't believe it) and is playing on the varsity soccer team.

Being a freshman he wasn't sure he would play at all. Much to our surprise and delight, he started the game. I suddenly became the proud mama, only to be humbled later when son said all the seniors and some juniors were not there to play. That was why he started. Ok I was still a proud mama.

Coach apparently said "Ok, freshman and sophmores, here is your chance to show me what you got. Let's go." So away my boy went. He played an awesome game. And again I was the proud mama.
He started the next game and played the entire first half, until.....he twisted his ankle. Ugh. He was hopping, and limping around, but refused to ask to be taken out. When half time came and went, and the game restarted, my boy was on the bench. Apparently, he told coach about his ankle. He did not play anymore the rest of the day. :(
At least when he was able to play, he did play very well, and was able to show the coach what he could offer the team.........when he is healthy.

Oldest son came away from the day, saying "Mom, that was so fun playing with those older guys. They were shovin me around pretty good, and I gave it right back to them. Did you see how they totally grabbed my jersey? That just fired me up more! It was such a blast!" Yup, that's my Mr. Intensity.

Oldest son was also exposed to playing with the varsity teams of 2 public schools. Needless to say he heard LOTS of swearing and using the Lord's name in vain. He was so disgusted about it. He commented "Mom, there really was no need for all of it. I know I get pretty intense (an understatement), but it just looked bad. It really surprised me. I even saw them get so mad they were on the ground and pound their fist on the ground. It looked like a tantrum. It was kind of funny to watch that." I am so grateful that he could see what bad sportsmanship looked like and how NOT to act. Oldest son plays for a christian school and represents Christ everytime he puts his uniform on ( well, really at all times). What does he look like when he gets beat on a ball, when his team loses, when the referees are being unfair. Is he being Christlike in sports? You don't have to be a wimp and be Christlike. Just gave him something to reflect on.

What a great experience.

A whirlwind

These last few weeks have been some of the most stressful times and yet when I look back at it, I see God's hand in all of it.

Dad's surgery went very well, however the recovery part has not been so easy. He spent 4 days in ICU and is now on the stepdown unit. He, finally, is starting to recover the way he was supposed to. All the complications have resolved at this point. Hopefully he will come home in the next day or two. Praise God he is ok. I spent one night at his bedside so Mom could go home and get some sleep. She came and relieved me the next morning at 6am. Again, praise God he is out of the woods. Now it will be just the typical recovery and rehab.....at least I pray it is.

The other stressful thing that has been going on for the last several months, started in March, is my job situation. This will have to be another blog entry as so much has happened. To me it is an absolute evidence of how God loves and takes care of me....even if I was the only person on earth, he loves ME! It is a chapter in our love story.....God and me. Like I said, another entry as it still is unfolding.

Please pray

Please pray for my dad. He is have a quad. bypass this friday, 2 days from now. This is not a surprise to me, but I think it is to him and my mom. He has had many stents put in every so often. I knew it was just a matter of when they would say no more stents, we need to do a bypass. Please keep him and the doctors in your prayers, thank you. I will post on how he made out.

Summer life

Wow. It has been forever since I last posted. Could it really be 3 weeks? Wow.

As you can imagine life here with 4 kids and being summer just moves very swiftly. We currently are having my nephew for a couple days as his parents are away. We also have oldest son's friend who was supposed to spend one night, has now decided to stay another night. So we have added an extra 2 boys (one 11 and another 13) to add to the testosterone bunch. Whew! Poor babygirl, surrounded by 5 boys on a rainy day. Thank goodness for coloring books.

We soon will need to get into preparing to go back to school. I ordered a few uniforms a couple of days ago and will soon get all their school supplies. I am torn about school starting. I sooo enjoy the sleeping in and being lazy and doing whatever we feel like during the day. But I do miss the structure and routine that school provides for us. So I am looking forward to that. I dread the homework and projects. Mostly the projects. UGH!!!

Since I last blogged we also took a trip to DC/VA. We toured the national zoo, the museum of natural history, the air and space museum, and visited my sister and her family. It was a great getaway. BTW, we are now experts at riding subways. They are so fun and the kids LOVE them.

Friday while we were at the zoo, a severe thunderstorm came ripping through DC. We had to take cover in the gorilla exhibit. An entertaining exhibit, albeit stinky.

Tomorrow morning we are going to the pool with all 6 munchkins. We have a dentist appointment for older boy in the afternoon then going to the minor league baseball game with all you can eat food. Yummy!! So tomorrow will be a busy day. Then the fun stops and the work begins. I am on call sat-wed. Yuck.

I will blog later about my adventures in the cabinets and closets.

Confession time

Confessions are never easy. Today was my time to confess.


I have been totally slacking in my weight loss, eating right, exercising, and living a healthier life style. I have been eating whatever I want (bad, bad) and pretty much only exercising with the trainer once a week, and maybe one other time that week, IF I felt like. Yeah right?!

Last week my trainer said he was going to weigh me and do my bmi and fat mass. OH Great!!
So I decided I would cancel the next session (which was today) and hopefully the next time I saw him he would forget. Well.......

I did not cancel, because hubby ratted on me. Hubby told trainer I was going to cancel cause I didn't want to weigh in. Great.

My trainer did as he promised and talked about weighing me in. But I refused! So then came why.

Why did I refuse to be weighed in?...... cause I did that 2 days prior and my numbers were WORSE!!!!!

You have got to be kidding me. Ok, it wasn't really that surprising. I kind of knew that was coming. But I didn't want my trainer to know that. Ugh!

So I confessed my numbers were worse and that there was no need to humiliate me again. Sigh.

WHAT????? WORSE??????? How can that be? What are you doing??????
I have been bad and proceeded to confess my lack of discipline.
"Ok well lets see how bad it is" he says "what did you eat today so far?"

Now comes the real "you have got to be kidding me?" "Do I really need to tell you what I have eaten?" He had given me a total eating plan with how many calories of what and when they should be eaten. By the time my session was, I should have had breakfast of about 425 calories, a snack of 160 calories, and lunch of 375 calories.

I had a slice of toast with peanut butter and 2 chocolate chip cookies.

"WHAT?????" With his expression of complete disbelief shock.
He continues to say "That is soooo not even close!"

So then he proceeds to kill me. It's pay back for all those cookies I had. I am not sure I will be able to walk tomorrow and we are doing another family 5K (one that I will be WALKING, cause I am not in good enough shape that I could run the entire thing).

As I leave he states "I will be seeing you in here tomorrow and thurs. and friday right?" To which I say "Yes, except thurs. It is my scheduled day off per your schedule, which I will be taking." He says "Ok, see you tomorrow"

Yikes! How can I go to the gym when I can't even walk!

An awesome priviledge

What an awesome priviledge it is to be used by God to further His Kingdom.

Today I had the priviledge of praying with a friend as she accepted Jesus as her personal Savior. What a special moment. Hubby and I have been praying for her and her husband for quite some time. We never were quite sure where she stood spiritually. Today, my friend and I got together for breakfast, as we periodically do, and I boldly asked her "Is there a time in your life where you know for sure, you could drive a stake, and say you accepted Jesus as your Savior?" I borrowed one of my husbands' line.

She was honest to say "No, I haven't". So we talked some and I asked her if she wanted to do that today, and she said "yes, I do". So we both prayed and she asked Jesus to forgive her, and to come into her heart, so she could have a personal relationship with God. It was absolutely beautiful as we both had tears streaming down our cheeks. A new sister in Christ!!! If you are a believer, please lift up our new baby sister in Christ. That she may thrive and not get choked by the thorns of this world.

This is what life is really about. This is what counts, what matters. Winning lost souls to God's Kingdom. Doing things that have Kingdom value. Praise God from whom all blessings flow! Thank you Father for using me today, for your Glory.

More summer fun

Wow! It has been quite some time since I last posted. We have had an absolute blast of a summer so far. Busy, but great.

We vacationed to NYC this past weekend. It was the first time for the kids and they were troopers. Especially my youngest 2. We kept them out till midnight several nights and they just went right along without any meltdown. Baby girl took naps in my lap, on the tour bus, on the subways, or while we were eating dinner at 9pm at night.

Our only somewhat of a meltdown was when youngest son was way past done (it was the first day we were there and it was 11:30pm at night and we had done a TON of walking) he was exhausted. We were waiting, for what seemed like an eternity when you are tired, for the subway to go back to the hotel. He was afraid the subway would never come and then we would be stuck in the city all night and no place to go. So he started to cry. Poor guy. I think he was not used to seeing mom and dad "wing it", and not know exactly where we were going, and how to get there etc. Too much on the little guy. But we LOVED winging it. It was so much fun. But too much uncertainty for him.

Today we are celebrating his 8th birthday. Happy Birthday little guy. I often think, it should be the mom who should be celebrated on this day. After 9 months of being kicked and heart burn and swelling, not to mention the labor and delivery. So today I am silently celebrating that I made it through the 9 months, labor, delivery and raising him for the last 8 years. So "Happy survival day to me!" Praise God for getting me through this far!!

A whirlwind weekend or month

Whew!! We have had a whirlwind of a last few days, or maybe it has been all month.

It started with a date night with hubby on a thursday, dinner and a movie (terminator)...It was his birthday in a few days so I picked a movie I knew he wanted to see. Then friday night we went down to the beach did the boardwalk thing, older kids went to see Ripleys Believe it or not museum. Saturday was a celebration for Hubby's birthday, to make it a little separate from fathers day. We went shopping for him and he picked out a bunch of fun things and then we went out to eat at Chili's. Sunday was father's day and we took both sets of parents out to lunch to honor our fathers. Then we celebrated hubby's father's day afterwards ( and sort or his birthday).

Monday comes and hubby goes to Chicago for three days. He comes back and ends up with major issues at work and works till 3am thurs. (or actually fri) Friday night we hosted a cookout/bonfire. We ended up having 18 people come. It was quite the fun night. Saturday morning we went to see our friend's kids play ball before we headed to Baltimore to see the Orioles play. We didn't get in until 1am. Today we had kids church and we were invited to go to the beach and bbq and fish and hang out. But I think we are going to need to pass. We really wanted to go, but the kids and ourselves are just way too exhausted. Too many late nights and not enough mornings to sleep in. Not with golf, and tennis lessons.

We still have yet a busy week coming up, going down to the beach again to meet up with some friends that we only see once a year. They come down from PA and stay at the beach for a week, so we make sure to see them at least once. I am on call several days for work this week. Then sunday we leave for NYC. This has been a very busy summer so far. I didn't think it was going to be so much go, go, go, go, go. I think Aug. will be much slower....I hope. Although I do enjoy being busy, just not too busy.

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all those dads out there!

Also Happy Birthday to my hubby. He has the unfortunate birthday that falls on father's day this year. Not only does he have to share his bday with fathers day, but he has to share it with his dad and my dad too. We will celebrate his birthday next week, I think. A day to make him feel extra special.

Happy Fathers Day and Happy Birthday hubby.

Today

Today I am spending the day running kids to golf lessons and hoping to stay in and do a ton of laundry. The pile resembles that of Mt. Everest, however I think my pile might even beat that big mountain. Too much time spent out of the house, and not enough time at home. The time I have been home I have just collapsed and wanted to do NOTHING.

So we did the golf lesson in the morning for the 2 older kids, I went to the gym while they were there. The 2 younger kids got to play in the kids gym. After lessons we came home and started on the laundry and checking facebook of course. I have until this afternoon, then it will be time for little man's golf lesson. He is so excited he can barely contain himself. Then I need to go and sign him up for tennis. He chose not to do baseball this summer so that he could do tennis this summer. Then it will be home to do more laundry and hopefully not get called in. If I don't get called in to work then we will head to a concert tonight. The family will still go even if I don't get to go. Oh I hope I get to go!

I guess I should stop blogging about what I am going to do and actually go do it. Ha! Now that is a good thought. First I am going to shower and spend some time in God's precious Word. Then back to rebooting the laundry beast.

Busy already

Summer is here and we are in the full swing of it. Well, we are attempting it between all these summer storms we keep having. Lots of rain and thunderstorms. I thought April showers bring May flowers. What do you say when May and June has just as much rain as April?

We have already christened the pool, attempted a pool party (rained so we just had the kids over and watched Mall Cop), starting with golf lessons tomorrow. The kids have had a full onslaught water balloon fight with the babysitter. It was such a good fight, even when I came home from work, the babysitter wasn't ready to leave and the kids continued for another 30 minutes. I love having a babysitter that the kids absolutely love. I came home and babygirl was crying no mommy, and saying she wanted babysitter to come everyday. We also have attend a couple of graduation parties (we have a total of 5).

It's been fun so far with much more to come. Next up is....after golf lessons in the morning then on to a movie birthday party (the whole family will go minus hubby. Hubby will be in Chicago) more graduation parties, tennis next week, a date night for hubby and I, and a day/night to the beach.

I just love summer activities!!

Milestone

I have reached another milestone. Albeit a small one, I still consider it a milestone.

I have lost another 2 pound for a total of 15 pounds so far. WooHoo!!!

I kind of took a month off of intense workouts and eating right. With that I was able to maintain my weight. I still worked out. It was just more like 2 times a week versus 5-6 times. I still attempted to eat right, I just cheated a lot more. So all in all, I am pleased that I at least maintain and didn't gain back what I originally had lost. Whew!!! That would be rotten to have to lose that weight all over again. Once was bad enought but twice, yikes!!

I have had several sessions with the personal trainer. Whew!! He certainly does kick my butt. My arms feel like they are sore 24/7. I kept asking him yesterday "You sure I signed up for this? That I am PAYING you to torture me?" He kept reassuring me that yes it was my idea. UGH!!! The price I am paying for vanity (and for health too, having to lose 30-35 pounds does make me unhealthy)

Something to dwell on

Here is something I am thinking about today.

Our God is an Awesome God!

Just reflecting on His majesty, His sovereignty, His holiness. And yet He wants a relationship with little 'ole me. Powerful!

June is here

I can't believe June is here. Woohoo!!!

Two of my four kids are out of school. My older 2 have only half days left, and will finish this friday. I am sooooo glad.

I have started the younger 2 on, the summer chore and reading schedule. They get to pick their favorite chore, and they must do it everyday monday through friday. My youngest son picked unloading the dishwasher, so at least once a day he needs to make sure he unloads the dishwasher and puts everything away. Babygirl is still thinking, so until she makes up her mind, I get to assign the chore. Widget claimed cleaning the living room, and oldest son claimed cleaning the boys bathroom ( I am lovin that child!!!!!). LOL. The older 2 kids have until next monday before they have to start on the summer schedule.

They are also required, by mom, to read at least 30 minutes a day. No reading, no computer. No if ands or buts about it. MOM'S LAW!! Sometimes, I will allow them to work in grade appropriate workbooks for 30 minutes instead of reading. I get them at Sam's club for the grade they are going into. Youngest son will get a 2nd grade book, which has math and reading,and handwriting and something else (no science or history stuff). Babygirl will get a kindergarten book that has matching and letter writing, and which one doesn't belong. I think the books go up to 6th grade, so widget can get one too. But oldest son will just have to read. He has to do 3 book reports over the summer for school anyways.

Those are our 2 staples for summer. A chore a day and 30 minutes of reading. Then the rest of the day is pretty much theirs to play and have fun!!!!

Here's to the summer schedule....sort of.....

An evening of baseball

Youngest son and his class made a banner for this special minor league baseball game. They earned free tickets and had the priviledge of walking out on the field and having their school announced for particpitating in "Hit the books" campaign. Youngest son was so excited to do this. This first picture is the banner his class made.

Here is youngest son and I after he walked the field.

Here is a pic of the family.

This was youngest son walking on the field. Look at that smile.

Lastly we enjoyed fireworks after the game.

We had two bonus things that night. First our team won...woohoo. And second was a promotion by Applebee's. If our team was able to get 3 strike outs in the 9th inning, every one in the stadium would receive a $5 coupon to Applebee's. Our pitcher pulled it out for us and struck 3 guys out. Woohoo!! We received $30 in coupons to Applebee's and the game was free to us too. JACKPOT!!!!!!! What a fun night!

Encouraging words

It's amazing how powerful encouraging words can be to someone.

To have someone say "you look nice" can give your posture a little lift as you walk a little taller.
To hear someone say "you are so smart" can make you feel so intelligent and wise, you are ready to write that book..
To hear the words "you are so strong" makes you feel you can climb Mt Everest.
To hear someone say "your children are a blessing" gives you that warm fuzzy feeling and relief that maybe you are doing it the way God wants you to.

Saying encouraging words is not my strength. I so want to be better at encouraging others. I want to be used by God to bring that needed "lift me up". I want to spur my loved ones (family, friends and those around me) with their walk with the Lord. To encourage them to keep strong in raising their children in a Godly way. Someone did that for me yesterday, and what a blessing that was for me to hear. It certainly does give me a push to endure the difficult times.

To that I say THANK YOU!!!!!

My Assessment

Well the dreaded first session is over. It really wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. He did all my measurements (ok, that was bad-chest, thighs, belly, calves, and arms), weight, health history, injury history, etc. Then he took me over to the weights to see what I could do. I was a little nervous, cause I have only done weights twice since joining the gym 3 1/2 months ago.

First I had to do these push-up on this bar that was about my chest height (it was like doing a push up against the wall), then he lowered the bar about a foot and I did a few more. Then he lowered the bar another foot, and a few more push ups. By the time I ended, it was about a foot off the ground.

Then onto another aparatus that I had to do these pull ups, or chin ups, but you put your knees on this platform and it lowers you down. Basically, you are pulling up your own weight up and if you can't, you pull only a portion of your weight. I couldn't do a pull up on my own to save my life (too much weight and not enough muscle, LOL). Thank goodness for advancing equipment, so doing pullups with only a portion of my weight was a breeze. We did that many times until we got the right weight. Whew!!

Then onto one of those giant 1/2 balls. It is flat on the top and a ball on the bottom. I had to stand on it and then do squats while balancing. That actually was easier than I thought it was going to be. Who knew?!

And then time was up. He was just testing, now comes the next session when he starts kicking my butt. My mom has termed it "Justin's torture chamber". LOL. (She has heard what hubby is going through.) Time will tell.

Uh-oh

Oh no. I am not sure what I just did. My husband convinced me to sign up with his personal trainer. Yikes!!

So I just signed up for my first session which will be my assessment. How much body fat I have (like I really want to know that), my bmi (ok, I already know I am in the overweight catagory, do we really need to go there?), what I can (or cannot) do with the weights and my diet info. Oh no! Do I really have to tell him how much I cheat?

I am VERY nervous about this. My husband nearly got sick after his first session. I told the trainer he needed to be nice or I might not come back. I would come back, but I don't want him to know that. LOL.

So Wednesday morning at 8:30 am, I am preparing for my first session of torture. AHHH!!

16 more days

That's right 16 more school days until the last kid is done with school!!!!!

I can't wait.

No more getting kids up at 6:15am.
No more running out the door to make the bus.
No more packing 4 lunches.
No more checking Math homework.
No more projects.
No more quizzing spelling words.
No more vocab. quizzing.
No more having to wash uniforms.
No more making sure gym clothes are clean.
No more carpools.
No more "My stomach hurts. I need to stay home."
No more "Where is your belt, and jacket."
No more "Oh no! I forgot....(fill in the blank)"
No more book reports.
No more phonics test to help study for.
No more looking for last minute show and tell.

AHHHHH!!!!!!! School is tough work for me. Man oh man. Making sure all 4 kids stay on top of things. I think I am more excited for the kids to be out than the kids are.

Here's to looking forward to summer break!

School search

Just an update on the ever constant quest for the perfect school. Ok, I know there is no such thing as the perfect school. Believe me I know that.

But we are in search for the right school for our youngest 2 children. Mostly our youngest son. Babygirl will do fine wherever she goes (which will most likely be with youngest son). Anyways, after praying about it, we have made the decision and feel it is the right one. Unfortunately, that does mean the younger 2 kids will continue to go to a different school than the older two. We had just hoped to get them all in to the same school at some point in time. Now that would be a foreign concept to us. LOL. Well, it won't be next year.

At least we have next year figured out. (We tell the kids we take it a year at a time.)

Girls Night Out!!

Don't you love it when you get the chance to go out with just the girls, or the guys go out with just the guys!

Tonight was one of those wonderful times of GIRLS NIGHT OUT!!!

We had a blast just laughing and talking. One of the girls even made us play a game and brought along a prize for the winner. I didn't win. And one girl decided to treat us all and secretly paid for all our food and desserts. I didn't pay. But I did take pictures. And we all laughed and laughed. At one point I was laughing so hard I was crying. Gotta love those belly gut laughs!!!

I needed tonight more than I thought I did. Thank you girls!!!!

A month to go

Today is exactly one month until our first 5K run. Uh oh.

I feel as though I am going backwards in my exercise. Yikes. I ran last week or was it the week before? Hmmm. Not sure. When I did, I ran 4 miles on the treadmill. I was sooo tired by the time I was done. I was bored too. It took me 51 minutes to run the 4 miles. I have yet to run on the road or on a track. I think I need to do that soon.

Lately I have just felt so unmotivated to exercise. Maybe it is all this dreary rain we have had. It seems to be an unusual amount of rain. So many days in a row.

The weight loss has continued at a snails pace, still going, just ever so slow. I am at a total of 13 pounds lost as of yesterday. I am pleased that I am still at least going in the right direction, down instead of up. I still have a long way to go...20 more pounds at the minimum, 24 pounds preferably. I have not been strict with my diet, and therefore the snails pace. But I want this to be a life style change not a diet. So I allow myself a brownie if I want it, it is just one brownie not 3. Or if I want ice cream, I don't have a bowl full, I have a weight watchers ice cream bar for 130 calories. Better choices is what I am trying to do, and better portion control as well.

It took me many years and 5 pregnancies to put this weight on, it is not going to come off overnight. If it did, it would be so unhealthy and would surely all come back and then some. So I am trying to do it right. To do it a way in which I can live with for the rest of my life not just a period of time.

I guess I better get out there and start running so I know I can be ready for the 5K. Yikes, I have only a month left to prepare! At least I have 13 less pounds to be dragging along. That should make it a tad easier. I hope.

Want to do something fun?

Last week I got a text while I was at work from Hubby. It said "Want to do something fun?"

After nearly passing out (It was a school night, I had to work the next day, and hubby is not a spontaneous type of guy) I texted back "YES!!!!". That was my exact response. Then he texted "Want to go to the beach, have dinner and walk the boardwalk, and get funnel cake?"

What? Are you kidding me? That is one of my favorite things to do. Of course I want to do that.
WooHoo!

Wait a minute. My hubby is being spontaneous and asking me if I want to do one of my favorite things. Hmmmmm. Now, I am getting suspicious. I am thinking he has something up his sleeves. It could be good news, so he is in the mood to spoil me. Or it could be bad news so he is buttering me up. Hmmmm. The wheels are turning. He had been in meetings all day. I wonder what is going on.

Well, after getting the kids from school and ball practice. The kids were not so keen on our idea. They were tired and didn't want to be out late. PARTY POOPERS!!! Aren't mom and dad supposed to be the party poopers? So we do a modified version and go to the mall get dinner at the food court for one specific reason......they sell funnel cakes there! LOL.

Then we proceed to a nearby park that has a walking trail and several different playgrounds along the trail. Oldest son was not excited at all about this. His response was "Oh great the younger kids will have fun on playground, you and dad will be talking, so what does that leave me doing? This is going to be so boring!" The joys of having a 13 year old.

Oh phooey on you, was what I wanted to say, but I let it go. Well off we go. As soon as we are out of the car the kids dash for this real cannon that was used a way back when. Next thing I see is oldest son, climbing on it with the other kids, sticking his head in the barrel. Boring eh? So we proceed along our walk and come to the first playground and all are playing on it and even hubby and I were swinging on the swings. They had a high bar and oldest son was showing off how many chin ups he could do. I was impressed. I couldn't do a single one. LOL.

We proceed along the path and start having running races. Then we come to a fountain and the kids are all loving playing in the water and throwing coins in making wishes. Then we walk some more and stumble upon some fitness station so we are all seeing if we could jump on the logs that are standing straight up. Now that was interesting. Back on the trail for some more walking and playgrounds. We found lots of wild life. The kids spotted a Blue Heron. Oldest son is carrying babygirl on his shoulders and they are laughing. I asked oldest son "Was it as bad as you thought it would be?" He looked at me with this sheepish grin and said "No, it was actually pretty fun." I give him a half hug, smiled, and thanked him for giving it a try. I am so grateful he wasn't determined to be bored.

Time to leave and the kids were not ready, including oldest son. Ok, 10 more minutes. After all they were all getting along and having a blast.

That gave hubby and I time to talk. "Ok what is this all about?"
"Nothing."
"What? Nothing?"
"Nope. Nothing other than I just wanted to woo you and I know you like this kind of thing. I just want to court you."

AWWWWWWW! If that wasn't the sweetest. I love my Hubby! Too bad I was wondering what was up all evening instead of enjoying what was going on. That will teach me to look into everything, instead of just enjoying the moment.

Spring

Spring is here. This so far, is the first spring in a long, long time, that I can remember not being so totally busy that I don't know which end is up.

Normally we are living at the baseball field, eating at the baseball field, and sometime someone is sleeping at the ballfield. Not this year though.

We did not sign up the younger 2 kids for ball this spring. Instead they want to take a tennis clinic, and cheerleading clinic which will happen in the summer. Hey, I am for spreading the sports around so I don't go completely nuts like every other spring.

We are still able to enjoy ballgames through oldest son, as he is playing on the middle school team. Widget is playing soccer. We love to watch him play, but I think he is getting either tired or bored with it. He wants to play tackle football come fall. Yikes. We will see on that one.

Quest for the right Education

We are constantly evaluating, praying, searching, waiting, resting, keeping our eyes open for the right education for our children. We have had a real peace about the older 2 kids and where they are going to school. We plan and feel it is the Lord's plan to keep them where they are. They are thriving, enjoying school, their friends and are content to stay where they are at.

Now the younger 2 kids are a different story. They are not settled yet and we are in the process of finding that right fit for them. Baby girl could stay where she is and that would be ok with me. However the logistics and financial end need to be evaluated based upon little mans move. We feel very confident he will be switching schools next year. His present school only goes up to 3rd grade so he would need to switch soon anyways. I am concerned he may not be working at grade level. He might be, I am just not sure.

The school is very intense and challenges kids. If you know my little man, he is not an intense, competive, push-push kind of kid. He is a lovey, cuddle bear, who is very much an experiencial learner. Let him experience it and he will remember every detail, tell him about it and it might go in one ear and out the other. Anyways if you are aware of the A Beka program, you know it can be very linear and dry, no thinking outside the box. No experiencing the material, just lots of memory work. Now we kept him at this school because they push and concentrate heavily on reading. My philosophy is reading is the gateway to all learning. If you can't read the science or math problem how can you do the problems. Little man struggled with reading and therefore I wanted him to have intense focus on reading. We can catch up later on math, science, social studies if we need to, but lets get down the basics, the foundation....reading. Maybe that was a wrong way to approach his education, but that was how I wanted to proceed. I was afraid he would try to keep up on everything and his reading would suffer and then get brushed over in a big class. His class size now is 8, so he can get more personalized attention when needed.

Why are we proposing to move him? Well, it seems to be too much on him emotionally. I do feel his reading has greatly improved this year and that was what we wanted. I certainly want him to have a love for learning and staying there I feel would impede that. AHHH!!!

So the quest for the right school for little man begins. This is the hard part for me. I know, no school is perfect, but which school is right for little man. Dear God lead and guide us to the right school.

Motivation vs. Non Motivation

Hmmm. What makes that happen? Some days I am so motivated I could conquer the world. And then there are days like today when all I want to do is NOTHING.

Today is a rainy day, the house is quiet-no tv on, all the kids at school, hubby at work. It's a perfect time to go through baby girls room and get rid of those things she really doesn't wear or play with, but as soon as she sees me getting rid of them, they suddenly become her prize possession. Or it would be a great time to go to the gym and work out as long as I please, at my own pace- push myself with an extreme, intensity or just take a nice LONNGGG walk on the treadmill and do strength training. It would also be a great time to go shopping for all those miscellaneous items that I would rather not do with kids around.

There are tons of things I could do, should do, but probably won't do today. Then tomorrow when I have all the kids or I have to work, I will be so motivated and then frustrated that I didn't accomplish what I could've, should've, but didn't.

I need to spend time with my Lord and give this day to Him. That may be the only way I can get some get up and go.

BUSTED!!

As I was typing how unmotivated I was, hubby comes walking in the door (He forgot his cell phone and babygirl needed a sweater for school- he took the younger 2 kids to school on his way to work) and sees me just chillin on the couch with the computer. At least I was on the computer blogging, instead of what I want to be doing- watching a chick flick and eating bon bons. Then I would have really been busted. LOL.

Just kidding.

I asked hubby to pray for my unmotivation today. I think I will go and spend some time reading my bible and praying and then I will head to the gym. Maybe if I just get moving I will stumble upon that elusive motivation.

The progress continues

That's right the progress continues. After a very tasty Easter weekend, I felt like I needed to start all over from scratch when Monday came. Whew! And of course those pesky 2 pounds that always haunt me came back.....AGAIN.

Ugh!

It is not surprising, just frustrating.

So I worked out monday on the eliptical, and took a break yesterday (I had to work and was way too tired by the time I got home) and back to the gym today.

I upped the ante today. I didn't even feel like working out when I went, but hubby came with me and that ALWAYS motivates me. I want to IMPRESS MY MAN, so I push myself a little more than I intended.

We could not get elipticals next to each other, so I decided to hop on the treadmill behind him. But there was a mirror in front of us so we could still keep an eye on each other. Woo Hoo! He looked good too. I am still so in love with him. Ok anyways. So I ended up running (ok jogging) 3.1 miles today. YeeHaw!!! That is the length of a 5K.

I DID IT!!!!!! I actually ran an entire 5K without stopping, slowing down or this time over doing it. I was actually able to talk through it the entire time. WooHoo!!!!!

Scary thought...I am actually starting to enjoy running again. I haven't enjoyed it since I ran track in high school. Yikes!

A blond moment.....literally

I had a blond moment today, literally. Today I decided to throw all caution to the wind and change my natural red hair to become part of the blond community.

Yep that's right. I went blond. I still kept some of my red as highlights, just to keep a little bit of me in the process.

The big deal to this is I NEVER have changed my hair color EVER!!!! It has always been red. Not the bright copper kind of red, but still red. So to change to blond is quite a drastic look for me. And I am not stopping there. Tomorrow I am going to get my hair cut. Not sure what kind of style I am going to get, but my long straight red (oops) blond hair will be no more.

What's the occasion? The 10 lb. mark. You got it. I have lost 10 pounds. I have decided every 10 pounds I lose I am going to do something special for myself. This new hair is to push me through to the next 10 lbs. To motivate me. I hope it will work. Well it was fun even if it doesn't work.

So here is to me losing 10 pounds and going blond!!!!!! WooooHooooo!!!!!!

A great small group night

Tonight we had life group and what a great night it was. Each one of us in the group is telling our life story, one each night we meet. Tonight was our first story. It was amazing to me to learn so much about a person in just 20 minutes. This is someone whom I have known since I started going to the church 11 years ago.

Amazing.

There is such power in getting to know someone on a deeper level. The understanding of where they have come from, the experiences they have had, the choices they made, the challenges they endured etc. just makes you appreciate them even more. Then hearing the challenges they are facing now, the choices that will need to be made, what a priviledge to be able to join them in praying for those things, and then to see the results. WOW!

We also discussed committment. What is committment? What does committment look like? What does it mean to be committed to Christ, the church, each other?

One of the things, well two things that struck a chord with me, was time and money.

If you look at where you spend most of your time, and money, what does that say you are committed too. It reminded me of the question that I heard once "If you were accused of being a christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?"

Hmmmmm............

Something to ponder.

Preparation

Today I decided I needed to start preparing for the 5K run that we are going to do. Yikes. I went to the gym first thing this morning and hopped right on the treadmill this time. Not after I did the eliptical. I had in mind to run as long as I could, take that as my starting point and work my way up to 3.1 miles (the length of a 5K).

So I began by warming up for 5 minutes, then began my run (ok, it was definitely more of a jog than a run, but it was faster than a walk. LOL). At the 1.5 mile mark, I was done being comfortable. I was tired, my breathing was heavy, my legs were tired, my face was bright red, and my shirt and pants absolutely soaked from sweat. But I wasn't done in my mind. I had to go farther. I pushed myself to run 2 miles continually, without stopping, without walking, without slowing the pace. I actually increased my speed the last 1/4 mile, cause, I was so done. I just wanted it to be over with faster. The faster I ran, the sooner the torture would be over. And yes, this is voluntary. I am certifiably crazy!!!! Because, it did feel like torture.

BUT.....

I did it!!!! And that felt great......well after I cooled down and didn't have jello legs anymore that is. Whether I will be able to walk tomorrow is up for debate, but that is ok. I did it!!!

So that is my news for today. Besides, the fact that hubby is away again, so I am flying solo for the next 3 days. He was gone last week for 2 days, and has to go away at the end of April again for another 3 days. I know it could be worse, but it still is hard when he is gone.

Ow

That's all I have to say today is....

"Ow, Ow, OOOWWWWWWIIIIEEEEE"

Yep that's all I can say with every step I take. I guess I really did push myself yesterday. Ugh!

WoW!

Today I decided to push myself a little. I haven't been to the gym in 3 days, with hubby being away and work being very busy, I just haven't been able to get there. So today I was able to get there.

Boy could I tell it had been a few days. I started out on the eliptical machine and did a fat burn routine (killer), but couldn't keep my heart rate low enough so it kicked me out of that program into a manual one. Ok, I will roll with it. So I did 45 minutes on the eliptical at level 6 (I started at level one so I am improving) and went to go grab my coat and leave. Then I got an idea in my head. Scary I know.

"I wonder how far I can run now?" So I hopped on a treadmill and started running. Maybe not such a great time to see how far I could run AFTER I already killed myself on the eliptical, but here I go.

Well at a slow run I was able to run a mile. WOW!! I was very excited. I can't remember the last time I ran a mile. My legs were burning though, it really was legs that gave out before my breathing did. So I was VERY excited. I wonder between the 2 workouts if I will be able to walk tomorrow. Yikes!!

A dinner jingle by Widget

I just had to laugh and share a new little jingle that Widget was singing as he was eating the Beef Stew

"Your stew, stew, stew,
Is not ew, ew, ew"

That just hit my funny bone. I am at least glad Widget doesn't think my stew is ew. LOL.

A funny

Today I picked up my oldest son up from middle school baseball tryouts. On the way home he asked "What's for dinner? I am starving"
So I told him "I am trying a new twist on an old recipe."

He responds "Aaannnddd, it is........"

I say "Beef stew, and I have tried it. It is so yummy."

There is a moment of silence that lingers on for a few moments and then he says

"I know we are trying to be healthy and all. And it is good and all. And I am not trying to complain. I am really not. Cause I really know it is good for us......

(Wait for it here it comes)

BUT...... (LOL. I told you it was coming) when are we going to have normal meals again? I mean we haven't had cheeseburgers, or tacos or poppy seed chicken (a very creamy chicken casserole) or macaroni and cheese with ham in forever. I can't remember when the last normal meal was."

ROTFLMBO (rolling on the floor laughing my butt off)!!!!!!!!

I guess I really am changing the way I am cooking and it is noticed. I think my oldest thought
"Here mom goes on one of her tangents. It won't last long. I just need to grin and bear it and make it through until she reverts back to her old ways."

ROTFLMBO!!!

So I told him friday night will be his night, and I will make whatever he wants for dinner. He chose cheeseburgers on the grill. Little will he know I will make soy burgers, or veggee burbers, or turkey burgers with shredded zuchinni mixed in to hide some veggies. LOL. Just kidding. Although that is how I will make half of the burgers.

Yummy dinner

Oh my. So much for me trying to lose those 2 pounds I gained. I just made (well it has been cooking all day) a huge pot of beef stew. I made it a little different today. I tried a new recipe, pretty much the same but this called for some red wine vineager, garlic powder and a few other different spices that I don't remember or ever used in my stew. It turned out sooo yummy that I have been nibbling, or shall I say taste testing it all day, and then just had a huge serving for dinner. Somehow it probably was a serving for 3 people, not one. But it was so yummy, I couldn't stop. UGH!!!! I did work out today so maybe that will help..... a little?...... maybe?

Yikes!

Today I went to my very first spinning class. And let me say.......

OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!

I wonder if I will ever be able to walk again. Owie! I can't imagine how sore I am going to be tomorrow. How do those crazy people do it??? I only took a half hour class and I thought my legs were going to fall off. I am in awe of those who do the hour class. Yikes. Wow. This getting into shape thing is definitely an adventure. Maybe I will lose the 2 pounds I gained this weekend.

I got called in to the hospital and have worked the last 4 days in a row, one of which was a 12 hour day from 3am to 3pm. My sleep was off, my eating was off, I skipped taking my vitamins, forget working out, and my stress level was through the roof (we had some extremely sick patients who were literally on the brink of death...kinda stressful). All that does not help one to lose weight. So now I have to work to lose those 2 pounds all over again. UGH!!! It was hard enough the first time around not to mention doing it again. But I am committed to it. So I went and killed myself at the spinning class, thanks Bron.

Progress

Well I am making progress, albeit slow, it is still progress. An update on the weight loss, gym, eating healthy and passing it along to my family lifestyle. I have lost 8.5 lbs in the last 6 weeks. I have had my blood work drawn, and have made at least 2 new healthy meals a week (except this week has only been one new recipe, but 2 weeks ago, it was 4 new recipes). Hubby is still working out with me, and we are consistently hitting the gym 5 days a week. Two nights ago we had the older 2 boys working out with us at home and they were loving it.

Well we have even taken it to the next level (at least for us) we have found a 5K run that we are going to sign up for. Not only are hubby and I going to do it, but we are going to sign up the older 2 boys as well. They are so excited. We really want to stimulate and enforce a healthy lifestyle. It has not been that way for so long, so we have a lot to make up for, but at least we are trying now.

AHHH!!!! What are we doing? I can't run 3.1 miles. I have a lot of training to do before then. Thankfully we have time. I am going to see how far I can run next weekend. I have done a 6K on the eliptical machine, but does that mean I can run it. I don't think so. We shall see. Yikes! I am a little nervous about this.

Another adventure in cooking

Tonight I am trying another new recipe. It has become a regular thing around here, especially with trying new HEALTHY recipes. Most of them have been a huge hit. As my oldest said after one of the new meals "Mom, you're hitting them out of the park here lately." He's all baseball can you tell? LOL.
So tonight I am being even a little more daring and making.......
Zucchini Gratin
It has zucchini, squash, artichoke hearts, ground turkey, swiss cheese and several other ingredients but those are the main ones. I sure hope it is another home run!! I will post the family's results later.

Next on the list is possibly Seafood lasagna. Now that sounds yummy too!!!

Movie Review

This weekend we hosted a "Fireproof"' movie night. Unfortunately, each time we planned to see it, either in the theatre or at home, something came up and we needed to reschedule. So, we finally made it happen, with only one couple having sick kids and not being able to come. Not too bad for a third attempt. LOL.
We had many couples coming and not one had seen the movie yet. We were all in for the anticipation together. We all had heard the movie was great and had produced lots of tears.
One of the couples that came, brought "manly tissues". If he was going to cry, he was certainly not going to use flowery girlie tissues. LOL. So they decorated boxes of tissues. Manly ones with nascar theme, and girlie ones with gold and gold coins. It was hilarious!!
It was indeed a great movie. A must see for any married couple. I won't tell what happens in case anyone hasn't seen it, but definitely go see it!!!!!

A typical day with a happy ending.

Yesterday, I told my husband I needed time away with just him. I needed a date. No if and's or butt's we were going to go out and do something.
So I called our babysitter and made the arrangements.
That meant we needed to get the house ready for the babysitter. Ok kids time to get to the chores and start with cleaning your room and then rec. room. Well the bedrooms got cleaned and next was the rec. room. The middle 2 boys just could not get along. Ugh!! I hear yelling at each other, and name calling and boys not keeping their hands to themselves (someone was on their way to getting hurt), just being plain ole mean to each other. So I needed to intervene. I don't tolerate kids not respecting other people and that includes their siblings.
So I send the middle 2 boys to their room for an hour to spend time with each other to learn to get along. They needed to have forced time together to learn to appreciate each other. It worked. They came out of their room the best of friends. They even went outside and worked on a project together, building some kind of fort. Whew! Boy, I was really ready for that date.

Hubby and I went to the beach and had dinner. It was so nice and the weather was absolutely fantastic. We had a great time talking and not being interrupted by a child. We ended up getting coffee and going to the bookstore. What a relaxing time, SOOOOOO needed.
We came home and heard all about the kids adventure with the babysitter. They made ziti for dinner and milkshakes for dessert AND DID ALL THE DISHES!!!! Oh how I love our babysitter. Thank you God for putting her into our lives.

SNOW!!!!

Here are the pics!
Big brother helping babygirl go down the homemade "bunny slope", 4 steps off the back deck.
Widget being resourceful "using what he has to get the job done". He wanted to go sledding, but Delaware lacks hills. So he made his own slope, down the back steps.

Coco out having some snow fun too!

Babygirl doing her snow angels.

Youngest son being blown away during a gust of snow and wind.

We got a snow!! And lots of it!!! WooHoo!! We are so excited. It has been so long since we have had a good dumping. I will try to upload some pics later. Bye for now. Time for some fun in the snow!!!!

"Duh"

I had a "duh" moment at church today. We were singing a song and in the verse it said "It's not for us, it's all for Him". That struck me with what I had wrote yesterday. It was that light bulb that went off, another reminder.

I had it backwards. It is not about me including God in my daily life. It's about the honor and priviledge of God allowing me to be a part of His Kingdom. "Duh"....it's not about me, but about Him. My life, my world, my decisions, my mundaneness whatever, it's all for Him. I am here to glorify Him, not please myself.

The sad thing is, I know this. Hence the "duh".

It seems when I tend to take my eyes off the Lord, and living life without my focus, that is when the mundaneness comes. It slowly creeps in and the joy of life sucked slowly out. Like a balloon with a slow leak. You don't even know it is leaking until the balloon is significantly smaller. (Our pastor used that analogy, I could relate to it). I didn't even realize that was me. I was losing air and didn't even notice it. My walk with the Lord has not been priority. If I get the time I will read my Bible and spend time fellowshipping with the Lord. How come I found time for facebook, and time to blog, and time to check e-mail. Hmmm..... Priorities, are messed up again.

I seem to have this theme in my life, gain perspective, get on track. Then lose perspective and get off track, only to regain perspective and get back on track. Will I ever stay on track? Am I alone in that struggle? The appearance of people I admire, shows me I may be a freak. What is wrong with you? Keep your eyes on Jesus, how hard can that be? Apparently for me, VERY HARD!!!!!! Oh God forgive my waivering ways. The sad thing is I too give off the appearance that everything is just fine and dandy with me. It's not that I have wandered and have these great big sins, I just have been living for me and not the Lord. Bascially being your typical "good person". Pastor taked today about being zealous. Have you lost your zeal for the Lord? Couldn't have been a better wake up call for me. Especially since that was how I was feeling and didn't know it. God is so good all the time. Praise God for Him who meets me where I am.

God in all things, big and small

Do you ever have those days where you just are tired, weary, just lacking that spark to life? That was how I woke up this morning. Just blah. But there was too much to do today that would allow me to continue in my blahdom (ok I know that is not a word, I just couldn't find another word). So I got out of bed and went to the gym. On my way there I just gave the day to the Lord. "Ok, Lord. Today is your day. However you want this day to go, I will follow you." That can be a scary prayer. My plans don't always match what God wants. Even though I know Gods plans are best for me, I tend to like my plans.

So off to the gym I go. Oh, here is a progress note (I said I would only mention the good ones, LOL) I weighed myself and have lost 6 pounds in the last 3 weeks. We (hubby and I) have worked out 4-5 days every week. I am up to working out for an hour, 30 minutes on the treadmill and 30 minutes on the eliptical. I end up leaving exhausted but I am doing it. Anyways that is the update.

So I go to the gym and do my workout and see a dear friend while I am there. She and I chat a little while I am walking on the treadmill. What an encouragement she was to me.

After that I go home, shower and head down the road to pick oldest son up from spending the night at a friends, birthday shop, grocery shop, go to the pet store (shavings for the rabbit), book store and fill the truck up with gas. Poor oldest son was so tired from his sleepover. He was a trooper with a good attitude (we don't always have that). We got so much accomplished in such a little amount of time. I felt so productive. A far cry from how I felt this morning. Praise God! God is so good all the time. Just giving my day over to the Lord, and seeing how my day went (even just a half day) is just the reminder I need to give all things, even my blahness, over to the Lord. The Lord, and His plan for me is so much more than I ever imagine. Even in the mundaneness of life, the little things, the everyday things. That is an easy place for me to not include my Lord, the simple things. It's when things are hard, or decisions need to be made, or great things happen that are the easy times for me to include and rely on God.

I want to see God in all things big and small. I need to open my eyes and my heart up to see God every day in all things.

Our new adventure

As I mentioned before, we have a new adventure. It was our valentine gift to each other. I am almost reluctant to tell people in fear of expectation. But as people have talked about what they gave each other or what they did for v-day, I have spilled the beans.

So what did we give each other?

A memebership to our local gym, the powerhouse. Yikes!!

That's right. No more excuses. No more blaming it on my thyroid. It is time to get down to business and start moving to the beat to get this weight off.

We have no excuse now. The gym has daycare for the kids, except oldest son, he just stays home or we go while he is busy with all his other activities. The kids have had a blast. We tell them "load up, it's time to go to the gym." They love it. They ask "Are we going to the gym today?" They have all fun stuff; wii fit's, hopscotch, nintendo game systems, tv with disney channel on 24/7, plus kitchen and doll stuff. We have wii fit and other games, but somehow it is just not as fun as playing at the gym. At least they love it.

We have been faithful so far. My goal is 4 days a week. We are entering our 3rd week and still going strong. We are eating healthy meals and snacks now. Even the kids have noticed the healthier meals and have loved it. My oldest said "Mom you have been knocking it out of the park with your new recipes." If that doesn't bring inspiration, I don't know what would.

I love that hubby and I are doing this together. It has been so much fun. Well as fun as it can be working out.

So that is our new adventure. Hey, we were even able to get a great discount for the gym because I am a nurse and work at the local hospital here in town. We are bascially getting 2 memberships for the price of one. Now you gotta love that!

I will post my progress, well the good news of it anyways. LOL.

When it rains it pours

Today I took my oldest son to the doctor....again. He is beginning to be an expensive child here lately. LOL.

He came home from school wednesday and told me about an incident in gym class that day. They were playing kickball with a giant kickball. My son somehow got hit in the ear with the ball. He said it hurt a little. So I told him we would keep an eye on it and see how it was the next day or two.
Thursday he came home from school and told me his ear began ringing off and on throughout the day, and also hurt off and on as well. Ok we will see the doctor. He went to pep band that night (he plays the trumpet) and when I picked him up he said a boy was talking to his left and he barely heard him. Oh boy. He also felt like he had fluid or something clogged in his ear.

Well took him to the doctor today and he has a ruptured eardrum. UGH!!!! He was on antibiotics for his sinus infection which should have helped his ear, but didn't. So now it is getting infected as well. They put him on a stonger antibiotic and gave him ear drops as well. They want to see him in a week to make sure it is healing.

So for my oldest in the last week we have had 2 doctors visits=2 copays, 4 different prescription medications, plus another doctor visit next week=another copay, plus a new suit (for the funeral). Whew!! He is going to break my bank. I know they say kids get more expensive the older they get. I am finding that to be true. Thankfully we have good health insurance and it really isn't an issue, but it could be. Praise God it isn't.

Thankfully my son has a pretty high threshold of pain, and motrin does the trick. Poor kid has had a lot to deal with these last 2 weeks.

What a night!

Whew! Last night was a rough one. Babygirl just could not get settled last night. Everytime she fell asleep, she would wake up about an hour later and ask some question about MomMom Dodd.
"Mommy"
"Yes, babygirl"
"Where is MomMom Dodd now?"
"She is in heaven with Jesus."
"But we will see her at the fumera?"
"At the funeral, we will see her body laying in a casket, that looks like a bed in a box?"
"But her heart is in heaven."
"That's right"
"Oh, ok good night"
"Good night sweetie."

Then an hour later it would be.
"Mommy, can MomMom Dodd walk in heaven?"
and so the night went. Hour after hour. Poor girl was exhausted in the morning. So was I. I hope I gave her the right answers. How do you explain death and heaven and a soul to a 4 year old in the middle of the night. Ugh. I pray God spoke through me last night. I think she finally had a 3 hour period of solid sleep from 4am-7am.

I allowed the kids to stay home today from school if they wanted. Everyone did except my oldest. His class was shooting off their bottle rockets that they made in science and he didn't want to miss it. With babygirl's lack of sleep and everyone just not themselves, I was going crazy. The kids were just as onery (sp) as they could be. UGH!!! Hubby left for a little while to get his hair cut so he escaped the madness. So tonight hubby stayed home while I went shopping. A little retail therapy. AHHH!! For those of you who know me, know I really don't like to shop, but anything to get out of the house and a break from the kids. That sounds terrible, but it is the truth.
I actually went to buy oldest son a suit. He is an honorary pall bearer and will be part of the ceremony. He did not even have a sports coat. So I went and bought the store out. He is growing so much I just couldn't decide on which size he was. So I bought all 3 sizes I thought he could be. I will be returning the ones that did not fit tomorrow.

I am sending all kids to school tomorrow and have taken off work myself. I get a bereavement day. Hopefully, I can get all those last minute things done. Widget still needs new dress shoes, his look terrible. I need to get a haircut, not sure that will get done. Oh well, we shall see what really happens. Tomorrow I do plan to spend some time soaking in God's Word and being still ("be still and know that I am") and have that peace that only comes from Him.

Tomorrow has got to be better than today.

Grieving

Today we are grieving the loss of my husband's grandmother. She was 96 years old. She was so ready to go home and be with the Lord. She even stated this past week "How long does it take you to die? I thought it would be quick." She was ready, very ready. She had lived a full life and she was tired, very tired. Even though we all knew in our hearts that this day would come, and that every day we had with her was one to be grateful for, it is still hard to believe she is really gone.
My youngest son and she were great friends. Up until this last 8 months or so, little man and MomMom Dodd, and grandma would go out to lunch together and then go to the Amish market together. They did this at least 3 times a month, if not every week. Granma would pick him up from school (either preschool or half day kindergarden....they did this for years) and they would decide which resturant they would have lunch and then enjoy lunch with each other and then proceed down to the next town and shop for some groceries. Little man LOVED these times with his great MomMom Dodd. They would have the most interesting conversations especially from such a young boy. One day MomMom Dodd told me "I hope you don't mind, but I call him 'My Boy' "(she had 4 girls, she never had a son). From then on Little man would say to her "you know I am your boy". He would always love and kiss on her and always made her feel special. Those two had a special bond, that was only between them. She did not treat the other great grandchildren like she treated him, although she tried not to let the others know. He was special to her, and she was special to him.

He is having a hard time with this loss. When we first told him he just buried his head under hubby's arm and wouldn't come out. When he did, he ran upstairs with tears streaming down his face. I gave him a few minutes and then went to talk, and console him. Every time I came near him he would run away. I found him in the rec. room and then he ran downstairs to the old playroom/ exercise room. I found him hiding behind the doors hoping not to be found. I was able to grab him and just hold him. I told him it was ok to cry and be sad, and that should be the way he should feel. We are all sad. He sat there stiff as a board not wanting to be held. But I held him anyways. After a while, he finally collapsed and cried some more. I asked him if he wanted to go out to her house (that was where everyone was concregating) and he jumped up so fast and said yes. He couldn't get to her house fast enough.

We arrived at her house and he was able to see his Aunt Jodi was crying, and grandma, KK, and his other 2 great aunts crying. I think he felt comfort, and realized that it really was ok to cry and be sad. He didn't really cry anymore, but did tear up at times. He saw his aunt KK crying when he was sitting next to her, and all on his own he just reached over and gave her the biggest hug with one of his hands rubbing her back. He just sat there like that for a moment. She gave him a smile and said thank you. He later told me "Mom, she was crying on my shoulder when I hugged her. I think she needed my hug. She is sad like me." Such insight from a little 7 year old.

Tonight he prayed and asked God "to be with me. I am so sad and scared not to have MomMom Dodd here anymore. Please take care of her." He is grieving and so are we. I am so grateful, he is able to mourn and talk about how is feeling. Please pray for him. Loss is so tough, and to have to try to deal with that at a young age is so hard for them to understand. He is a blessed boy to be able to have spent that time with his great grandmom. Many do not get that opportunity.

The other kids are dealing with it well. Babygirl doesn't really comprehend and is trying to. She asks all kinds of questions that feel inappropriate, but she is 4 and is trying to grasp it.

The next few days will be tough with the viewing and funeral. It's tough for us who are left behind, but for her it is a glorious time. I am so happy for MomMom, but so sad for the rest of us. Please keep us in your prayers. Thanks.